Sex Can Get You into Trouble

...especially if it's a dog named Sex :) This was posted on another blog and I felt compelled to re-post it here. It apparently came from an Ann Landers Advice Column some years ago.

Woof Woof Woof!!!


A Dog Named Sex.

Everybody who has a dog calls him “Rover” or “Boy” I call mine “SEX“. He’s a great pal but he has caused me a great deal of embarrassment.

When I went to city hall to renew his dog license. I told the clerk , “I would like a license for Sex.” He said,“I would like one, too.” Then I said, “But this is a dog.” He said he didn’t care what she looked like. Then I said,“You don’t understand, I’ve had Sex since I was 9 years old.” He winked and said,“You must have been quite a kid.”

When I got married and went on my honeymoon,I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex.

He said,“You don’t need a special room. As long as you pay your bill we don’t care what you do. I said, “Look you don’t seem to understand,Sex keeps me up at night.” The clerk said,“Funny-I have that same problem.”

One day I entered Sex in a competition, but before long the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there,looking disappointed I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets.“But you don’t understand,” I said. “I had hoped to have Sex on TV.” He said, “Now that there is cable ,it is all over the place ,it’s no big deal anymore.”

When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody over the dog. I said,“Your Honor I had Sex before I was married.” The Judge said,“This courtroom is not a confessional. Stick to the case, please.”

Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said that’s not unusual. It happens to alot of people.

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over and asked,“What are you doing in this alley at 4 o‘clock in the morning?” I told him I was looking for Sex. My case comes up Friday.