Baby Boomer Facts about Social Security, Divorce and Death

Today on my Boomer Beat Radio Show, my guest (a retirement financial planner) told me something I was unaware of. He said if I divorced and never remarried, I would be entitled to the social security benefits of my ex upon his death.

Furthermore, according to the Social Security Administration website, if you are divorced, but your marriage lasted 10 years or longer, you can receive benefits on your ex-spouse's record (even if he or she has REMARRIED) if:

You are unmarried;
You are age 62 or older;
Your ex-spouse is entitled to Social Security retirement or disability benefits and the benefit you are entitled to receive based on your own work is less than the benefit you would receive based on your ex-spouse's work.

And that's not all......if you remarry and that marriage ends by death, divorce or annulment you may still collect SS benefits from your ex.

To learn more about ex spouses and social security, check out this retirement blog

Why Must the President be a Nigger in my BoomerWorld

Someone called President Obama a nigger at The Duke Center for Living Fitness Center this morning. I didn't actually hear him say it. By the time I was summoned to the area, I heard him say "Obama has done more to divide this nation than any other President." Once a small group of us gathered in the area of the gym where they were, the two men left and headed to the men's locker room.

Okay, so here's how it went down. Miss Merlita, who looks 60 but is probably closer to 90, was sitting in a chair in the weight training area, along with three other older white men. I was approximately 20 feet away in another section of the weight training area along with one some other people. I kept looking at her because I was curious as to what she was doing since she wasn't using the exercise equipment attached to the chair.

Suddenly, she motioned for me and another man to come to her.  I remember thinking, "She's getting ready to talk my ear off!"  When we got there she pointed to one of the men and said he just called the President a nigger.  We started joking with her about her bad hearing until another man nearby confirmed that he also heard it.  As our conversation escalated, the two men got up and headed towards the locker room.

When I posted what happened on Facebook, someone asked if anyone said anything to the two men. No one did. I think this goes back to the mentality of older blacks in the South. They say "Shame on whitey and let's put it in God's hands," but they don't want to be confrontational. They still believe in trying to keep the peace even though the world around them is reminiscent of a period they want to forget. Had I actually heard the comment, I am sure I would've gotten in their faces but I, too, chose to follow the crowd. Perhaps that means I'm mellowing out as I grow older. But it doesn't mean I don't see the racism that exists among boomers and senior citizens as it relates to President Obama.

The Boomer generation has been labeled the greatest generation but when I see and hear how MY GENERATION is reacting to this upcoming election, I have to say we are anything but great. Disgraceful is more like it.

Boomers with Health Issues May Be Unlucky at Love

If you're single with Shingles, high blood pressure, arthritis or some other aging-related health issue, your chances don't look too good when it comes to finding romance.  That's because a survey conducted by the online dating site OurTime.com has revealed more than 50 percent singles over the age of 55 say they would not date someone with health problems.

That would surely rule me out of the dating pool since I was diagnosed with congestive heart failure at the age of 49.  Fortunately, my husband chose not to make it an issue since he married me the following year.

But never fear, if you don't look all that hot with your aging face and body, that's OK because, according to the same survey, 68 percent of adults age 55 and older say they would be willing to date someone they felt was less attractive.  

Other key points of the survey:

Some 70 percent of men and 59 percent of women say they are willing to date people of other religions.

65 percent of people 55 or older said dating more than one person at the same time was fine.

60 percent said they would date someone outside party lines.

46 percent of adults 55+ said they were open to dating someone of a different race

Where do you fall in line with this survey?

All Baby Boomers Look Alike in the Dark

On Thursday of this week, I was shopping in Harris Teeter (my favorite grocery store) when the lights went out.  I'd never had that experience before, although one of the employees said  it happens there about once a week.

One lady asked how long it would take before the lights came back on so she could check-out.  That's when we discovered that although the lights went out in the store, the power for the cash registers were working just fine.  No problem there.  We may not have been able to see the price of anything as we shopped but the scanners at the registers would help us out.

When it was my turn to check out the cashier kindly asked me if I was a senior.  I have to admit I was taken aback by her question.  Although I thought I was looking good after an intense workout at the gym, I was certain the cashier  had not mistaken me for a high school girl but I sure couldn't believe she thought I was a senior citizen.  What?!  Are you kidding me!

I asked the cashier if she was serious and if she thought I looked like a senior.  She didn't respond to the question but she covered it nicely by saying, "Thursday all seniors get five percent off their grocery bill and I forgot to ask the gentleman ahead of you so I didn't want to make the mistake again."

Well, she did make a mistake but I didn't want to get indignant so I asked her if 55 qualified as a senior.  She said I had to be 60 so I told her if I was still shopping there in five years, I'll qualify.  Then I turned to the white-haired woman behind me, who CLEARLY looked like a senior, and said, "I guess we all look alike in the dark."  

And if it's any consolation, I did get some free seafood from the seafood and meat section.

Celebrating Grandparents Day for the Sixth Year

If anyone had told me I would be a grandmother before the age of 50 and my daughter would become a teenage mom, I would’ve called them a liar and reminded them that my daughter was raised with the right morals and values so that wouldn’t ever be an issue I would be concerned about.  It’s probably the same thing Sarah Palin thought about her daughter, Bristol. 

While my daughter is working diligently to complete her final year in college, her stepfather and I have joined the ranks of primary caregivers for five-year-old grandchild. We are part of a growing trend in America—joining nearly millions of grandparents who have grandchildren living with them.

Here are more numbers from the AARP about grandparent caregivers: 

Nearly 7.8 million children live in households headed by a grandparent or other relative

More than 2.5 million grandparents say they are responsible for most of the basic needs, such as clothing, food and shelter, of one or more grandchildren who live with them.. 

21 percent, the percentage of preschoolers who are cared for primarily by their grandparents while their mother is employed or in school.

My mother and I were both the same age when we had a baby---age 32---and we were both married.  That trend seems to be fading away as grandmothers become younger because their daughters are having children at a much younger age.

Is there a blame to place for this so called "new normal"?  What do you think?

Are Black Baby Boomers Invisible

While on Twitter the other day, I noticed a "tweet" from @huffpost50 that said something about baby boomers transforming aging with a link to an article. Since I knew the tweet was connected to the Huffington Post I decided to click on the article. Staring me smack dab in my baby boomer eyes were several people standing on a stage---one being Arianna Huffington herself. The caption under the photo made reference to the people in the photo as a panel on aging. Immediately I wanted to know where were the black baby boomers?

Of course I tweeted my concern (SEVERAL TIMES) and finally got a response from @huffpost50 indicating they were attempting to reach out to me about blogging. GREAT! (And yes, I'm still waiting to hear from someone).

But here's my issue: Practically every time there is a discussion or panel assembled to discuss the baby boomer generation, the black baby boomers are left out. It's as if we have no voice. Nobody thinks we have anything to say---or perhaps nothing credible to say.

I remember when Tom Brokaw's BOOM generation was broadcast. I just knew it was going to be fair and balanced because, after all, he's a journalist. Instead, he had two Ivy league blacks who certainly didn't travel down the same road as the OVERWHELMING majority of the rest of us. And not once did he mention Motown--which influenced the entire generation.

To add insult to injury, there are rarely any health studies exclusively for older black adults---unless it has to do with sickle cell anemia. But the cold, hard truth is we get the same diseases as white baby boomers and we should be studied individually for possible trends in health conditions. Why is it that black women have a higher rate and risk for breast cancer? How does menopause affect black women versus white women and how much of it has to do with heredity, environment, etc. And will someone please stop lumping ALL women in the same BMI (body mass index). We all know black women have a little more meat on their bones and it doesn't always mean they're overweight or unhealthy.

These are just a few of the issues plaguing a generation that calls itself "the greatest generation ever."

As for black baby boomers, stop trying to make us the invisible ones.

The Death of a Baby Boomer in Social Media

I am one of those baby boomers who's all over the internet. You can find me on Facebook, Twitter (@bevmahone), LinkedIn, Pinterest, Google Plus, Boomer Authority, Blogger, ShoutLife and yes, even MySpace.

I am a bonafide boomer and media go-to-gal with plenty to say but what happens to my social networking life when I'm no longer around. According to an article by the AARP, if you die without leaving specific instructions, the online service where the data is stored determines what to do with your information and content.

Once the folks at Facebook find out someone on the site has died, they give the family two options. They can deactivate the user's profile or "memorialize" it. A memorialized page will allow friends and family to continue to see the profile and post messages on the wall, but no one can log into the account, and the deceased's page will not show up in a search.

So you and I will not only have to decide how and who we want handling our financial affairs after we die, we also have to think about how we want our digital estate to be handled.

Would you like your Facebook friends to be able to see and post on your page after your death, or would you feel more comfortable if your profile is removed?

Every Photo Tells a Story

My dad was born on July 22, 1926. Today would've been his 86th birthday but he died of heart disease in 1983 at the young age of 57. Yes, I miss my dad. I was very close to him---much closer to him than I am my mother, who is still alive, but that's not what this blog post is about.

This blog is about the photo you see to the left. It was my dad's high school graduation picture---taken in 1944. I never saw this picture until after my father passed away because he apparently never kept a copy or it was lost somewhere. But I do recall him telling me the story behind the photograph.

The photographer who was originally hired to take the pictures of the graduating class backed out when he discovered he was photographing "negroes." According to my dad, one of the students in his class went home and told his dad about the situation and his dad made arrangements with the school to take the graduation photos. This dad was a farmer who apparently had an interest in photography but couldn't get any steady work in the field because of his race.

He proceeded to take pictures of the graduating class---all 19 of them. My dad says he doesn't know if the school paid him for his services but he remembers his mother (my grandmother) sending him to school with some change to give the school when he picked up his picture.

Had it not been for this unknown photographer, I probably would've thought my dad never graduated from high school.

AARP Tests the Spelling Skills of Baby Boomers

Back in 1996, a group of AARP members in Cheyenne, Wyoming decided to create an AARP National Spelling Bee. This was their fun way of challenging their peers to keep their minds sharp as they age.

Seventeen years later, the spelling bee is still going strong. The 17th annual event will be held August 11, 2012, at The Little America Hotel and Resort in Cheyenne. It's open to anyone age 50 or older who compete for gifts and prizes.

The competition begins at 8:30am and is free to spectators.

In addition to spelling bee, visitors will enjoy exploring historic museums and hotels, and nearby attractions; shopping at western-themed stores; or finding a special treasure among the many art galleries. The Laramie County Library, named Best Library of the Year in 2009 by Library Journal magazine, is a popular attraction for spellers.

Visitors will receive a special rate at Little America Hotel and Resort, which includes a free round of golf, by calling the hotel directly at 800-445-6945 (rate NOT available online). Details of all Cheyenne events and attractions, and additional lodging options, are available online at www.cheyenne.org.

Black Baby Boomers Remember Mayberry Too

"For many baby boomers, the loss of Andy Griffith earlier this week was like a death in the family." This was the opening sentence in an article I read the other day in the Winnepeg Free Press about the death of Andy Griffith.

Yes, Andy Griffith transformed himself into Sheriff Andy Taylor weekly on our television screen when I was a child and I actually believed there was a town somewhere in North Carolina called Mayberry. He, Aunt Bea, Opie, Barney and the rest of the townspeople gave us an up close and personal look at what small town living was like back in the day. Andy wasn't your typical sheriff who used his badge to strong arm folks. If I'm not mistaken, he didn't even carry a gun.

In Mayberry, you could leave your doors open and your car doors unlocked. When you walked down the street everyone greeted you and you certainly didn't have to worry about out-of-control children, drugs and crime. The worst crime ever committed in Mayberry was when someone stole some chickens from a farm and had to spend a night or two in jail.

You always saw ladies wearing dresses and the men were always respectful.


Could that be why we never saw any blacks on the show?

Do the Children of Black Baby Boomers Lack Motivation to Carry the Torch

This post was inspired by an article I read in the Buffalo News .

The article in the Buffalo News was titled: Black community suffers when no one steps up to keep businesses running. The article focused on a 71-year-old black man who cashed in his life savings to start his own business 41-years ago. Now he wants to retire but there's no one around to take over. His grown children, according to the article,are turned off by the long hours and the responsibilities so they don't want to carry the torch. The business owner now fears his worst nightmare: his business will fold.

The article further states the absence of succession plans to carry black-owned businesses into the next generation is a national problem with far-reaching implications. The phenomenon derails economic momentum, preventing a transfer and accumulation of wealth, and it can confine black communities to lingering poverty. It erodes the hard-fought gains of the previous generation, handicapping and forcing the next generation of entrepreneurs to start their ventures from scratch.

So what happened? Why is it that the children of black baby boomers lack the desire to follow in their parents footsteps---especially if their parents have laid out a clear path for them? Do the children of black boomers also feel a sense of entitlement as their white counter-parts?

Or perhaps it's OUR FAULT? According to the National Black Chamber of Commerce, only 15 percent of the nation's 2.1 million black-owned companies have identified and groomed successors. Have we not taught our children enough about the value of owning your own business and what it means to hand it down to the next generation?

Perhaps it's a combination of both.

AARP and Baby Boomer Men are on Fire

Who says men are the only ones who can have "eye candy?"

Imagine my pleasant surprise when I saw who was gracing the cover of the summer edition of AARP magazine....none other than DENZEL WASHINGTON! So what if it's only a picture. It still looks good enough to drive any baby boomer woman crazy and he is definitely EYE CANDY (no disrespect to his lovely wife Pauletta).

Denzel is one of 21 baby boomer men who are honored in the June/July issue of AARP the Magazine in its first ever “Men on Fire” list. Blazing with soul, style, and sex appeal, these 21 men are a hot mix of lovers, thinkers, and rebels.

The “Men on Fire” list includes a handsome assortment of men, including actors Colin Firth, Antonio Banderas, Liam Neeson and Samuel Jackson, musicians Yo- Yo Ma and Jon Bon Jovi.

“Our readers understand that sex appeal is ageless, so we thought a feature on the sexiest men over 50 would be a great way to kick off summer, ” said Nancy Perry Graham, editor-in-chief of AARP The Magazine. She's got that right!

Personally, I'm glad to see more lists like this coming out to honor our baby boomer men. Boomer Diva Nation was the FIRST to do it in 2010

Although the AARP Magaine doesn't come out until Thursday, May 24, you can check out the online version NOW at www.aarp.org/magazine.

Nearly Half of Baby Boomers May Die Without a Will

Remember that old saying: "Up the creek without a paddle." Well, it appears some baby boomers may be swimming in the deep end of the pool when it comes to leaving a last Will and Testament.

According to RocketLawyer.com, nearly half of Americans are taking a big risk with their family's future by not having a Will. When it comes to protecting digital assets (Facebook account, online photos, passwords), 63 percent of respondents say they don't know what happens to their digital assets when they die.

Sixty-one percent say they don't believe its important to provide for a pet in a Will.

If you die without a last will (known as dying "intestate"), the state will decide how your property is distributed. In community property states, this means that your community property will be given to your spouse (or domestic partner in some states.)

According to legalzoom.com, any property that is not given to your spouse will be distributed to the following people, in this order:

Your children, or if they are not alive, their children
Your parents
Your brothers and sisters or, if they are not alive, their children
Your grandparents or, if they are not alive, their children (i.e., your uncles and aunts)
The children of your deceased spouse
Any relatives of your deceased spouse
The state of your legal residence

Baby Boomers Restaurant Closes Its Doors But Needs No Bailout

After more than seven years in business, the restaurant in Des Moines, IA made famous by President Barack Obama has officially closed its doors.

The restaurant, known as Baby Boomers, became a huge hit with the community and the nation after candidate Barrack Obama named their chocolate chip cookies his favorite during his first presidential campaign.

He even asked for them in Iowa City during a campaign stop last week.

The owner says if it wasn't for Barack Obama, he probably would've closed up shop a long time ago. He said the President and First Family boosted business at Baby Boomers more than he could have ever dreamed.

The owners said they will continue to make their signature cookies but now they can also live a little.

Okay Mr. President, do you and the First Lady like to read because I've got a couple of books for sale.

Baby Boomers Being Bullied in the Workplace

According to a recent article by AARP.org, more and more employees over the age of 50 are being bullied in the workplace. Taunts like “stupid old woman,” “too old to keep up,” and “You should just retire,” are being hurled at by bosses, co-workers and even customers.

Just how bad is it? A 2011 survey by CareerBuilder found that 29 percent of workers age 55 and older said they’d been bullied on the job, compared with 25 percent for the 35-44 group.


Think about your own behavior. When was the last time you complained about how slow someone "older" was when it came to helping you?


The AARP offers some tips of how you can fight back against workplace bullying:


Write it down. Keep track of what was said or done and who was present.

Do your homework. Research state and federal legal options.

Talk to an attorney. Look for internal company policies (for example, zero tolerance of harassment or violence) that may have been violated.

Compile numbers. Gather data about the economic impact that the bullying behavior has on the company.

Update your résumé. You may have to find a new job. It can’t hurt to start searching.


For more information on bullying in the workplace, check out the complete article by AARP:
http://www.aarp.org/work/on-the-job/info-03-2012/workplace-bullying.1.html

How to Cure an Aging Baby Boomer Voice

Cosmetic surgery has allowed some baby boomers to turn back the aging clock. Now there's apparently a treatment that will keep your voice from aging.

An increasing number of patients are seeking help from the University of North Carolina Voice Center and other medical facilities.

Dr. Robert Buckmire, a UNC otolaryngologist says a person recorded at age 30 and again at age 70 will sound noticeably different because of the diminished bulk of the vocal cords. Lung capacity also tends to diminish with passing years, leading to a weaker voice. Sometimes a singer or speaker will produce a breathy sound through vocal cords that aren’t closing properly.

Changes in the brain can bring tremors and other signs of aging.

TIPS FOR PRESERVING SPEECH FOR A LIFETIME

According the National Center for Voice and Speech, most behaviors recommended for general health also keep people’s voices in good shape.

The research and teaching organization adds the following tips:

—Drink at least 64 ounces of water a day to maintain hydration.

—Support the voice from abdominal muscles when speaking or singing.

—Avoid “vocally abusive” activities such as yelling, screaming, coughing and throat-clearing.

—Warm up the voice before using it.

—Don’t talk or sing at unnatural pitches.

—Stay away from over-the-counter medications such as aspirin, which thin the blood and increase the risk of bleeding of the vocal folds.

—Drinks including caffeine and alcohol remove moisture from your system and should each be counteracted with an equal-sized glass of water.

FYI: An otolaryngolgist is a surgeon who diagnoses and treats disorders of the ear, nose, throat, and related structures of the head and neck.

Baby Boomers Needed for Migraine Study

If you're one of those people who suffer from migrane headaches, you may be interested in participating in an online study that may (or may not) give you some relief.

Quincy Bioscience is now enrolling participants in a migraine trial to evaluate a safe and natural supplement. There is no cost to participate and no travel is required. All participation is completed online.

Call 877 359-6197 to learn more.

The Online Migraine Trial is a double-blind, placebo-controlled study that is conducted online using migraine assessment surveys. All study supplies are shipped directly to participants. The trial will last 90 days. HOPE Trials is the research arm of Quincy Bioscience and has pioneered a form of trial research called ‘patient reported outcomes’ testing. You can read about their work here: http://www.centerwatch.com/news-online/article/917/site-less-pi-less-trials.

Insurance Companies Killing Off Baby Boomers

During a recent visit with my cardiologist, she recommended I have an echocardiogram to see how my heart is functioning.

For those of you who aren't aware, I have been living with congestive heart failure since 1999. Although I believe my health has improved with a change in diet, medication and exercise, an echocardiogram is necessary to make sure. An echocardiogram uses sound waves to produce images of your heart. This commonly used test allows your doctor to see how your heart is beating and pumping blood. Your doctor can use the images from an echocardiogram to identify various abnormalities in the heart muscle and valves.

Now one would think an insurance company would be delighted to have a patient undergo such a test because good results can mean LESS DEPENDENCE on the company. But NOOOOOOOOOOOOO---my insurance company, Anthem, has denied the test. First, they said it was denied because the request did not come from my primary care physician, which makes no sense to me since she does not treat me for heart disease. But then, after my primary doctor sent over my medical records, I was denied again because the company said I was the one who had to give permission for any records to be released.

I think I can understand the need for the insurance company to see my medical records to make sure they're not being ripped off by paying thousands of dollars for an unnecessary test but requiring my signature to have them released is RIDICULOUS. Call me on the phone and ask my permission. Instead, they sent some paperwork for me to complete to give them a medical history---which is making me duplicate a job already done by both of my doctors.

I'm of the opinion that Anthem Insurance doesn't give a damn about whether I get better or not, which doesn't make any sense because the longer I go without that echocardiogram means I will be sucking them dry with medical expenses.

Perhaps this is an insurance company's way of killing off the baby boomers.

Leave Politics out of Womens Health Issues

The fallout over the recent decision by the Susan G. Komen Foundation not to fund Planned Parenthood spread far and wide like wildfire in very short period of time.

The outrage expressed by women has now forced executives to do an about face. Here is a letter from our Komen NC Triangle Affiliate:

We know it has been a very difficult week for our supporters. The news has been full of stories about the National grant policy.

TODAY, we are pleased to announce that Susan G. Komen National headquarters revised its GRANTS POLICY.

We heard the concerns from many of you and hundreds of community members and shared the messages with National. As an Affiliate, we were just as distressed as you were over the lack of clarity and facts originally given by National headquarters concerning the grant policy. We are continuing to work hard every day alongside our volunteers and community health grantees to educate, save lives, and support breast cancer survivors.

The policy change means that all eligible agencies may apply for health grants. Our grants process must be free of political influence.

The NC Triangle Affiliate LEADS with its MISSION to improve lives and end breast cancer through empowering women and ensure quality of care for all.

In 2011, through support from the Race for the Cure, individual and corporate philanthropy, and other fundraising events, the NC Triangle Affiliate was able to invest $1 million in community health grants to fund 18 organizations throughout our 20 county service area.
Local community support helped to provide:
• 5,168 Mammograms
• 902 Diagnostic services
• 479 Clinical breast exams
• 95 Patient navigation services
• 85,782 Touched through outreach about breast health, symptoms, risk factors and regular screenings.

Thank you for your continuing support! We would not be able to accomplish everything we do without the support of our volunteers and donors. It is with you by our side that we move forward and continue toward our mission of a world without breast cancer.

Please help us spread the word and bring back those who left us over this issue.

Best regards,
Kathy Burns, Interim Executive Director

Don Cornelius Put Future African American Baby Boomers on the Dance Map

If you're an African-American baby boomer, you grew up with Don Cornelius and the Soul Train gang.

I was 14-years-old when the show made its debut. Before that I was a fan of American Bandstand and a local dance show out of Cleveland, OH---even though there were very few black faces.

I remember how excited I was to see people who looked like me on Soul Train dancing to the music I heard on the radio. Hearing my hometown music heroes, The O'Jays, singing the theme song and seeing someone I knew from high school dancing on the show kept me glued to my TV set every Saturday at noon.

Don Cornelius and Soul Train not only showcased the big stars, but we were also introduced to the up and coming talent and the blue-eyed soul of acts like Hall and Oates and Average White Band.

Who could forget the soul train scramble board or the dance line, where everyone became a star with their own unique style of dance? Soul Train became so popular at one point that some whites started complaining that they were being discriminated against because none of them were represented on the show.

According to an article in the Los Angeles Times, Soul Train became the longest-running first-run nationally syndicated show in television history, bringing African American music and style to the world for 35 years.

Soul Train put future African-American baby boomers on the dance map in a mighty big way. I am sad to learn of the death of Don Cornelius but as he would say, "I'm Don Cornelius, and as always in parting, we wish you love, peace and SOOOOOUL!

Baby Boomer Obesity and Paula Deen

In case you haven't heard, baby boomers are becoming known for more than being the "greatest generation." According to the U.S. Census Bureau and the National Ambulatory Medical Care Survey, a unhealthy percentage of us are being treated for obesity. And who might we have to thank for that?

Some are now pointing their bellies, hips and thighs to the queen of southern cooking: Paula Deen. This week, Deen announced she has Type 2 Diabetes---even though she continues to promote her high fat, high calorie recipes as the "best tasting, finger-lickin' good" food you'd ever want to eat. It's no secret she has made millions off of non-suspecting baby boomers with her products and best selling book, Paula Deen's Southern Cooking Bible.

But now get this: Paula says she is now teaming up with Novo Nordisk to endorse the company's diabetes drug Victoza. Victoza is an injectable drug used with diet and exercise to control blood sugar levels in people with type 2 diabetes. She also claims she will be donating a portion to the American Diabetes Association.

I wonder if the portion she plans to donate will be as hefty as those southern "kill me with a heart attack, hypertension, diabetes" dishes she's served up to us gullible boomers.