Thursday, October 30, 2008

Looking for Love in all the Wrong Places

When you’re a single woman over 40 years of age, finding companionship with the opposite sex can be a challenge. Gone are the days of Looking for Mr. Good Bar in a bar, or being fixed up with the friend of a friend. They're looking too!

These days, more and more baby boomer men and women people are discovering true love on the internet. I’m not knocking it because I did it and ended up getting re-married. But I have to tell you, I had to weed through some garbage to find him. You see, for every decent individual out there in cyberspace, there are at least a dozen weirdoes, freaks, and others who give the concept a black eye. There are men whose motives are simply to prey on the poor old widow, divorcee, or “I’m desperate” never-been-married woman.

Then you have many men in our age group are already married, gay or dead. So what’s a middle-aged woman to do when she wants to meet a guy? Here are some suggestions on some DIFFERENT places to meet men:

Why not try prison? I actually heard a woman on the radio recently talking about her upcoming nuptial plans with someone sentenced to 30 years behind bars. She fit the profile perfectly. She was over 40, had never been married, no children and no real social life. Before hanging up, she joked about knowing where her man was going to be at all times.

A Funeral: This is a great place—especially if the deceased is the “wife.”

Home Depot: Men love a woman who is good with her hands and is self-reliant. So go to the store and look like a confident women who can fix things. Strike up a conversation about that deck you're going to build on the back of your house and invite him over to help.

The Park: Walk your dog, cat, bird, rabbit or whatever! If you don’t have one, borrow one from a neighbor or friend. While you’re at the park, check out your prospects--make eye contact, smile, start a conversation about dogs, cats etc.

Sporting Events: Take a crash course in Football 101. Then buy yourself a jersey of the home team in your area and bring out that inner cheerleader at the game.

Where would you suggest?

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

African-American Baby Boomer Women Have no Time for Suicide

There's a new report out saying the suicide rate among middle-aged white women is rising rapidly. According to a report recently released by the American Journal of Preventive Medicine, the annual suicide rate for middle-aged white women between 40 and 64 rose 3.9 percent. The raw numbers for white women in this age group show a 35 percent jump, from 2,429 suicides in 1999 to 3,280 in 2005.

Meanwhile, the suicide rate for African-American baby boomer women barely raised the meter and certainly wasn't enough to trigger a discussion as to why the differences between the two female groups. What's the stress causing middle-aged white women to want to end it all?

Who knows better than an African-American baby boomer woman why it would be easier just to throw in the towel and push up some daisies than to deal with all of the craziness and drama that goes on in our daily lives.

Here's the facts:

More than half of us are single---with no real prospects in sight. Many of our men are behind bars, another portion are on the down low. Then you have those who are just looking for a handout, while handing out their own goodies to someone else.

The vast majority of us are not only trying to take care of ourselves but also take care of our children--children who have been written off by the public school systems and have been left to raise themselves because "dead beat daddy" ain't around and mama has to work more than one job.

And while on the subject of children--let's not forget about the mothers who are raising their children's children. Too many moms are stressed out over their wayward sons and daughters. Too many moms have grieved over seeing their children die from violence.

Some of us who were blessed to become first-time homeowners are now being threatened with foreclosure because someone sold us a dream that was beyond our means. Now we have to decide whether to put food on the table, keep gas in our vehicles or keep a roof over our heads.

On the other hand, some of us have never been afforded the opportunity to live on Main Street and Lord knows, we don't know the directions to Wall Street so that just leaves us stuck between a rock and a hard place.

OK, so if that ain't enough to make you want to kill yourself, what will?

Say It Ain't So Joe the Plumber

The most famous person in America is not JOE-Mama. It’s Joe the Plumber. As soon as presidential hopeful Barack Obama mentioned his name during the last debate, opponent John McCain grabbed hold of it like a pit bull and wouldn’t let up.

Joe the Plumber became the voice for every hard-working “wanna be self-employed” man in America. Initially I was proud of Joe because he represented my home state of Ohio---but then, as all good journalists do, I started looking into his background and what I found now makes me think he was a “plant” for the Republican Party.

First of all, Joe said he was a plumber and would like to buy a plumbing business but was worried about Obama's planned tax increases on small business owners earning more than $250,000. Well, what Joe failed to mention was that he makes no where near $250,000 and, furthermore, he doesn’t even have a license to do his job. The county Joe and his employer live in, Lucas County, requires plumbers to have licenses. So what’s up with that Joe?

Another thing, Joe admitted later on that he doesn't have a good plan put together on how he would buy Newell Plumbing and Heating from his boss. He said he's worked there for six years and that the two have talked about his taking it over at some point. Just how long is “some point?” It could be next week or it could be in 10 years. Surely Obama won’t be in office by then.

"There's a lot I've got to learn," Joe the Plumber told a reporter.

Joe, you said it right. There’s A LOT you need to learn so here’s my advice: Meet Joan—The Teacher. She’s someone who went to school, got a degree (license) and could certainly teach you a thing or two---especially if you’re required to take some kind of test to get your plumber’s license.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia...How Could You?

If you're a baby boomer like me, you probably grew up watching the Brady Bunch on TV This was the story of a lovely lady who was raising three small girls. She met a man named Brady who had three small boys. They got married and became one great big happy family known as the Brady Bunch--along with their housekeeper Alice and dog Spike.

In real life, the actors were far different than the roles they portrayed. Robert Reed, who played all-American dad, Mike Brady, was a homosexual who eventually died of Aids. Florence Henderson, who played goody two shoes wife, Carol, was having an affair with her TV son, Greg--played by Barry Williams.

Now we have Maureen McCormick, who played the prissy, yet sweet Marcia Brady. In a newly released tell-all memoir, she talks about being a cocaine addict who traded her body for a sniff on many occasions. "Here's the Story" reveals how the 52-year-old boomer babe got deeper and deeper into Hollywood's drug scene. She says she sought refuge in seemingly glamorous cocaine dens above Hollywood and spiraled down a path of self-destruction that took away her acting career and very nearly hr life.

Over the years she battled drug addiction and bulimia and was even treated in a psych ward and went in and out of rehab.

McCormick says she traded sex for drugs with a Hollywood cocaine dealer who later went to jail, and once allowed an older man she met at the Playboy Mansion to videotape her naked in exchange for drugs.

After several visits to a drug rehab, Maureen now lives a Brady-like life in the Westlake suburb of Los Angeles with her husband and their 19-year-old daughter. She says she has finally made peace with her past as a Brady.

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia....shame on you!

Saturday, October 04, 2008

Halloween: Baby Boomer Style

As you know, Halloween is just around the corner. Remember when you were a kid and you dressed up in your favorite costume?

If I invited you over to my house for a Baby Boomer Halloween Party, what or who would you come dressed as? Pick a favorite cartoon or storybook character from your past or your favorite actor/actress and tell us why you picked them.

I'll start:

If I'm having hot flashes, I'll come as Annie Oakley because she carried a gun! Otherwise, I would probably come as Little Bo Peep. I loved those puffed fancy dresses and I know I'd look really cute in one--plus it hides fat :)

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Baby Boomer Sues Over Circumcision

A 61-year-old Kentucky man claims his penis was removed without his consent during what was supposed to be a circumcision.

Phillip Seaton and his wife are seeking unspecified compensation from a doctor they say performed the circumcision for "loss of service, love and affection."

The Seaton's attorney said the doctor's post-surgical notes show the doctor thought he detected cancer and removed the penis. Attorney Kevin George said a later test did detect cancer.

"It was not an emergency," George told The Associated Press. "It didn't have to happen that way."

The lawsuit court claims the doctor removed Seaton's penis without consulting either Phillip or Deborah Seaton, or giving them an opportunity to seek a second opinion.

The couple also sued the anesthesiologist, Dr. Oliver James of Shelbyville, claiming he used a general anesthesia even though Seaton asked that it not be administered.

The Seatons' suit is similar to one in which an Indianapolis man was awarded more than $2.3 million in damages after he claimed his penis and left testicle were removed without his consent during surgery for an infection in 1997.